Sleep, or "am i dreaming i am writing this?"

I've not had a lot of success sleeping.  Actually, I've had a lot of success not being entirely awake.

I don't know about you, but there's some days I will be an hour into my office job (I know, you are amazed someone of my writing caliber makes a living doing clerical work) and I will suddenly say "Wait, what am I wearing?"  Then, realize for the first time that I've dressed myself and gotten all the way to work without consciously being aware of any of it.

Most times I am wearing something work appropriate. The rare times I'm not is when I've put on a work-appropriate shirt, but inside-out.  Yep, don't mind me, just wearing a button-up shirt with the seams on the outside.  Also, I'm not sure how I button up shirts entirely inverted and not notice; I probably should get David Copperfield on that.

"Maybe you should see a doctor?" Is a question that you might be asking if you if this is the sort of thing that would bother you.  I have. I've gotten an array of health checks which just reminded me that I need to stop piling candy on froyo and thinking it's still healthy. Also, I've gotten a sleep study for apnea.

Yes, sleep apnea. It's a nice way of saying "YOU PARTIALLY SUFFOCATE WHILE YOU SLEEP."  Usually it's a narrow airway or blocked sinuses, or a demon trying to steal your breath as you sleep.

For those of you who haven't had a sleep study for apnea, it's an all-night lab test.  If it's a decent place, it won't be as David Cronenberg as you imagine.  Just picture a nice hotel room where you go to sleep, except you know for sure that people are watching you. Oh, and lots and lots of electrodes. It is counter-intuitive that a study to see if you sleep normally puts you in an abnormal sleep state, but the tech must not be there yet. 

Also, they are checking to see if you stop breathing.  So, you know, the more alerts they can get, the better.  If you stop breathing they slap a machine on you to help you breathe and then tell you to go right back to sleep, because THAT'S going to happen.

It's pretty calm and serene. You sleep for a normal eight hours, they monitor you, you wake up, they give you a snack and then you are out of there.  Later you may have to get into an argument with your insurance company as to why this wasn't covered despite you following all the rules, but that's just normal everyday healthcare in America.

Anyway, my sleep is completely normal. No sudden gasping for air, no problems with my vitals. It just seems to be that period between waking and sleeping that I have a problem with - the fuzziness that one normally has for a few minutes can extend for hours.  In fact, am I even awake right now?  What did I write?

Okay, good.  I'm sure there's some typos in there I've already corrected that I don't see during this first draft, but overall, coherent.